How To Get Your Ex Back With The Law Of Attraction
If you have watched The Secret movie by Rhonda Byrne, you are probably no stranger to the concept of The Law of Attraction (LOA).
Now, the number one question you probably want to ask is this:
Can The Law Of Attraction Be Used To Get My Ex Boyfriend Back?
I am actually a bit hesitant to write about this topic because I may be accused of giving people false hope. After all, there is no way you can prove that The Law of Attraction works, not in a scientific manner anyway.
And it seems ridiculous in the first place. How can you get your boyfriend back just by sitting there and thinking that he will get back together with you?
But I still decided to write about this topic because I am currently conducting an experiment on myself. The truth is, I have heard about The Law of Attraction a few years ago but I never really put it into practice.
However, after reading about how world famous cartoonist Scott Adams, the creator of Dilbert has used affirmations to achieve great success in his life, I decided to give it a try.
Using A Very Practical Approach For The Law Of Attraction
Now, I am a very practical person when it comes to LOA. Let me explain what I mean.
You see, when it comes to the Law of Attraction, people either believe it or they don’t. In fact, most people are probably somewhere in between.
If you happen to be a skeptic, all I can say is just keep an open mind. I will not try to convince you here because I know how hard it can be to change a person’s belief.
As I mentioned above, I am very practical about LOA.
I will just test it for a minimum of 6 months. If it works for me, I will just continue using it even if I don’t know why it works in the first place.
If it doesn’t work for me, I will simply discard it. It is as simple as that.
In my opinion, there is really no need to make things more complicated than they need to be.
Is The Law Of Attraction Scientific?
Some people will say that this Law of Attraction thingy is not scientific or is just pure superstition. Personally, I don’t care about the science behind it because I am not a scientist. Why not let the scientists worry about it?
For me, I am more interested to know whether LOA can improve my life. And for you, you are probably more interested to know whether LOA can help you get your ex back.
Let’s put it this way. I believe all of us here have suffered from a cough or sore throat in the past. Unless the condition is really serious, some people will probably choose to consume a home remedy that has always work for them, instead of visiting the doctor.
However, if you ask several doctors whether those home remedies work, you will probably hear a very standard answer such as, “it can be helpful but it is not scientifically proven”.
Now, let me ask you a few questions.
If a home remedy has been very effective in helping you relief your sore throat, will you stop consuming it simply because it is not scientifically proven?
Will you wait till it is scientifically proven before you consume it?
I am sure your answer will be no. You would rather relief your sore throat now instead of worrying about the science behind it.
Some people may say that it is just a psychological effect. Well, if that is the case, so be it. I am happy as long as it works for me.
Personally, I view science as a way to make sense of the world around us but it is definitely not the only way. Spirituality is another way.
I do not look at things in terms of scientific or non scientific. I prefer to look at things in terms of whether they are useful to me or not.
Alright, I think I am getting a bit carried away. You are here to learn how to get your ex boyfriend back, not to hear about my ramblings. So let’s get back to the main topic.
How To Get Your Ex Back Using The Law Of Attraction?
First, a big disclaimer here! I am not an expert in The Law of Attraction. In fact, I am testing it myself for a minimum of 6 months.
However, I think I have read enough books and done enough research on this topic to give you the information you need.
You can look at it this way. I am doing all the research for you so that you don’t have to.
We are going to go through 1 technique together. It is called Affirmations.
How To Use Affirmations To Get Your Boyfriend Back
An affirmation is simply a positive statement that you repeat to yourself over and over again. For example, if you have always lack confidence in yourself and want to become a more confident person, you can use an affirmation such as “I am getting more and more confident every day.”
The purpose behind this technique is to reprogram your subconscious mind to think more positively.
It is said that on average, a person will have tens of thousands of thoughts going through his/her mind. For most people, at least 90% of their thoughts will be negative.
According to The Law of Attraction, when you are thinking negative thoughts most of the time, you are going to attract negative events into your life.
That is why it is a good idea to use affirmations to consciously input positive thoughts into your subconscious mind so that you will start attracting positive events into your life.
There are a few ways you can go about this method.
a. Mentally
You simply repeat the affirmation mentally to yourself. For example, if you are traveling to work using public transport, you are probably not too keen to repeat your affirmations verbally in case people think you are crazy.
Therefore, you can think about your affirmations mentally instead.
b. Verbally
You simply say the affirmation out loud to yourself. It can also be helpful if you look into the mirror while saying the affirmation.
c. Hand Written
You can write the affirmation down. Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert comics, used to write his affirmation 15 times per day, for a minimum of 6 months. You can read more about his experience with affirmations here.
The 3 Rules Of Crafting The Perfect Affirmation
Rule 1: It Should Be Written In The Present Tense
Your affirmation should be written in the present tense. For example, if you want to become more confident, it is better to say “I am confident” instead of “I will be confident”.
When you say “I will be confident”, it is something that happen in the future. Therefore, you will always have to wait for the future before you can become confident. That is why it is better to write your affirmation in the present tense.
Rule 2: It Should Be Written In A Positive Format
Your affirmation should be written in a positive format. For example, you should say “I am confident” instead of “I am not insecure”.
This is because your subconscious mind cannot pick up the “not”. If you keep on repeating “I am not insecure”, your subconscious mind will interpret it as “I am insecure”, which defeat the purpose of the affirmation in the first place.
Therefore, always phrase your affirmation in a positive manner. Avoid using negative words.
Rule 3: It Should Be Believable (Optional)
I put this as optional because it is not always easy to come up with an affirmation that is believable. In fact, John Kehoe, who is a pioneer in the field of Mind Power, says that it is not necessary to believe in your affirmation in order for it to work.
What you should do instead, is to keep on repeating the affirmation to yourself even if you don’t believe it initially. When repeated enough times, the subconscious mind will eventually accept the new message and start to believe it.
In fact, forcing yourself to believe in your affirmation is often counter productive.
Of course, if possible, it doesn’t hurt to be able to come up with an affirmation that is believable. For the 2 rules above, we are using this affirmation “I am confident”.
According to some experts, this is not even the best affirmation. It can be better. Why is that so?
Well, when you say “I am confident”, you probably don’t believe yourself if you always have a problem with your confidence. Therefore, your subconscious mind may resist the message.
A much better affirmation will be something like “I am getting more and more confident everyday”.
This is definitely more believable and therefore more likely to be accepted by your subconscious mind.
As long as you are consistently doing something to improve your confidence, even if it is just by 0.1%, the affirmation will be believable.
But always remember, this is optional.
Affirmations You Should Never Use To Get Your Ex Back
Before you try to use affirmations to get your boyfriend back, it is important to understand that a healthy relationship is not about manipulation.
You may be tempted to use an affirmation such as “Mark is taking me back” or “Mark is begging me to take him back”.
Well, that is definitely not a good idea. To a certain extent, it can even be considered as a form of manipulation.
More importantly, you need to look at the kind of mindset you are adopting when you are using this type of affirmation. It basically screams “desperation”.
When you are in the state of desperation, The Law of Attraction is probably going to work against you.
A much better affirmation will be something like “I am attracting the right man into my life.”
How To Craft The Perfect Affirmation To Get Your Ex Back
In order to craft the perfect affirmation to get your ex back, other than following the rules recommended above, you are also encouraged to do a little bit of self reflection.
For example, if your ex break up with you because you were too desperate or clingy, a possible affirmation you can use is “I am a confident and secure woman.”
After all, your ex is unlikely to get back together with you if you are still the same old person. Therefore, the affirmation is meant to help you get rid of desperation.
You should also spend some time thinking about what you want in a relationship. For example, if you are the one who broke up with your ex because he is spending too much time at work and you feel neglected, you can say “My soul mate and I love spending quality time together.”
Using this affirmation, there are 2 possible scenarios.
Scenario 1: You manage to attract your ex back and this time round, he realizes how important you are and treat you as a priority in his life.
Scenario 2: You attract a new person into your life who simply can’t get enough of you.
Now, we need to talk about scenario 2 a little bit.
I know your intention is probably to get your ex back. You have no intention to attract a new partner. However, it is a good idea to keep your option open.
After all, your ex may not necessary be the best partner for you, even if you think he is. That is why I told you not to use affirmation such as “Mark is begging me to take him back.” It is simply not a good idea to attract the wrong person back into your life.
Consistency Is The Key
In order for affirmations to work, consistency is the key. It is better to do it for 5 minutes every single day rather than to do it for 10 hours in one day and skip the rest of the week.
It is just like brushing your teeth. Most people probably brush their teeth twice per day, taking a few minutes each time. They don’t spend hours brushing their teeth in one day and don’t do it for the next six days.
When it comes to timing, different people seem to have different opinion on this.
For example, in his book Mind Power Into The 21st Century, John Kehoe recommends doing a 5 to 10 minute session everyday for 30 to 90 days.
Scott Adams recommends writing down your affirmation 15 times everyday, for a minimum of 6 months.
Based on the 2 recommendations above, you can decide how much time you want to spend on affirmations. You can choose to follow one of them or you can even incorporate both of their practices.
For example, writing down your affirmation for 15 times may take you about 5 minutes. You can also consider spending another 5 minutes to speak out your affirmation in front of the mirror.
Don’t Overdo It
As mentioned above, consistency is the key. Don’t overdo it in the beginning.
For example, some people may get so excited that they do it for 30 minutes everyday for the first week. After the first week, they are no longer so enthusiastic and they stop doing it. This defeat the purpose.
I realized that people who get too excited in the beginning usually fizzle out way before the objective is achieved.
Don’t make the same mistake!
Give Yourself The Best Chance For Success
The Law of Attraction or affirmations should not be treated as magic. Don’t make the mistakes of thinking that all you need to do is to repeat your affirmations everyday and your ex will automatically come back to you.
You still need to take some action. For example, if you have been neglecting your physical appearance, it is time to do something about it. I am not trying to be shallow here but men are visual creatures after all.
All things being equal, your chances of getting your boyfriend back is going to be higher if you look much better than before the breakup.
Look at it this way, if you really want to get your boyfriend back, you have to be willing to do whatever it takes, as long as it is not manipulative and you think your boyfriend is worth the effort.
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