Does She See You As A Friend?
Hi, first of all I am not quite sure if you will be interested to reply me as I am a man and would like to get my ex-girl friend back.
As far as I can see, you advise girls to get back their ex-boyfriends. I would be grateful if you could advise me. I don’t know where to start, but to make long story short, I am in love with a girl for last 12 years. We both were 21 years old when our relation started. We had a very good beginning and our relation continued for 4 years without any interruption.
Then, she was kind of forced by her family to get marry to another person, as I was not well established then, and she was from a renowned family in our country, whereas, I am not. Anyway, she started living with her husband in abroad, and we didn’t have any communication for more than a year.
I went through a very difficult mental situation. At certain point, I contacted her, and we had pretty friendly conversations. Later on, I came to know she was not having a healthy relationship with her husband, and wanted to leave him. However, it wasn’t that easy because of her family .
Then, I helped her to go to another country and to continue her higher studies. At the same time, I moved to the same country and continued my studies. We met for two/three times in two years of our living in the same country.
After two years she divorced her husband, and went through some crisis. In the beginning, her family didn’t accept her decision, and didn’t contact her for couple of months. I supported her mentally, and encouraged her to go forward in her life. I didn’t influence her in any way to make her decision regarding divorce. I knew she was still in love with me.
However, at certain point she told me that she loves me but she is not emotionally attached with me. She lost all her emotions to me, and felt sad for that. Since then we did have a kind of very friendly relation. She asked for my help now and then for any reason. She was dependent on me for many issues, specially for her studies.
She told me, I am the person with whom she can share everything, her happiness, her sorrows….She wants me in her life as a friend, wants to rest her head on my shoulder as a friend. However, as I am still in love with her, I don’t feel good being treated as a friend. She is now even searching for a partner to begin a new life.
Recently, I told her not to contact me anymore, as I would like to get emotionally out of her, and focus on other things. Unfortunately, I know that I can’t get out of her, I was, I am and maybe I will be always in love with her. Could you please advice me what should I do? Thank you very much in advance.
I don’t think she has lost her emotions to you.
It is more like there are too many things happening to her right now. In order to protect herself from feeling all those pain, she decided to shut down emotionally. Unfortunately, that includes the emotions she has towards you.
I think you acted a bit too hastily. She doesn’t see you as a friend. She see you as more than a friend. After all, which woman will rest her head on a normal friend? Which woman will share everything, her happiness and her sorrows with a guy she just regard as a normal friend?
You may want to get in touch with her again and see how her response is.
You may also find this video helpful.